Kokkuri-san vs Ramen Warrior
by BeautifulOjisan
Summary: Kohina decides to be a bad child but Shigaraki wins the game. Shigaraki x Kokkuri, might add more chapters later.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N**: KameKame here! Well this is a hella short thing but it came out anyway. Any more andd it'd be rated *beeep* Enjoy. /goes to slurp ramen myself. And btw if you saw this: [THIS IS THE NARRATOR'S VOICE]

**Warnings**: VOYEURISTIC CHILD AND DOG.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gugure! Kokkuri-san and the characters.

**Summary**: Kohina decides to be a bad child but Shigaraki wins the game.

* * *

Kohina, the young 10 year old 'doll', had been walking through the store with Shigaraki on a grocery errand, being demanded by Kokkuri-san to get out of the kotatsu and move and do something instead of getting in the way of his New Year's cleaning. Inugami was sprawled comfortably on her head, Shigaraki slowly following her from the back, carrying some food items and toiletries- when something huge caught her eye.

"Grand Ramen Lucky Draw! Win 100,000 yen worth of products!  
Buy any 3 ramen for one lucky ticket to participate!"

Her expression was as blank as it usually is.  
"Miiiii..." she says, staring straight at the large poster.

"Hm?" Shigaraki said, stopping next to the girl. "Oh, a lucky draw eh, Ojou-chan? That would be perfect for you." he would then chuckle, crossing his arms and turning to look at the poster itself, inching closer to look for any fine prints. "Seems pretty legit to me."

"Kokkuri-san will not notice if Ichimatsu bought 3 bowls of ramen." she tilted her head. "One ticket for 3 ramen..."

"Buy 30 bowls of it, my darling," Inugami put in. "That's more chances for my darling to win the grand prize!"

"Kokkuri-san will throw out the ramen." she replied, but the temptation was growing second by second. "Ichimatsu will become a bad child if Ichimatsu bought so much ramen."

"Well, if you really want to try, I'll help you hide em, eh, Ojou-chan?" the old tanuki offered. "It would be like a game of hide and seek for the fox."

* * *

The tickets were all blessed by the gods- or in this case, Inugami, it seems.

"Here are your tickets for the lucky draw, miss," the cashier handed the stash to Kohina, who held them in her hands and stared at them as if they were the tickets to heaven itself.

Inugami, in his slim male form, had been requested to carry all of Kohina's ramen.  
He instinctively reached his arms to cradle Kohina, stroking her head while rubbing his cheek against her hair, saying, "My darling, good luck with the lucky draw," while the tanuki pulled out a cigarette- he was not allowed to smoke within the store premises, so he waved at the two, "I'm goin' ta get a smoke, g'luck," and walked off.

The pair walked towards the designated lucky draw area- a large box and several shop promoters were there, attending to the various people who came to try their luck. Kohina, being short, had to wait quite a while in the queue, but as each person drew a reward and got various amounts of ramen, her mind drifted off to the dream that if she won as much ramen as she did, what she would do with them.

A while passed- Shigaraki, standing outside the store, has had his 3rd or 4th smoke. He turned to look into the store, curious as to why the two are taking so long.

He did not, however, expect to be greeted by a cart of boxes- full of ramen.

[It appears that they have won what seems to be a lifetime's supply.]

Kohina, who looked very satisfied with herself and sitting on the boxes, was carrying a large bowl of ramen in her arms, cradling it as if it was her baby.

"My darling, shall we head home and hide these before the fox notices?" Inugami, pushing the cart with all of his love and passion for her.

"-Wait. Didya two win the grand..prize? Aren't ya supposed to have to wait for some sorta verification process before ya claim the prize?"

"No, the boxes were already there ready to be given away," Kohina, blank faced as usual, responded. "Ichimatsu exchanged the grand prize for ramen."

[It seemed that Kohina prefers ramen over everything else.]

"Ah... this will be troublesome, Ojou-chan," the tanuki, scratching his neck, taking a few moments to survey the amount of ramen that just became a part of the household food supply. "The fox will throw out at least half of them or return them to the store."

"Ichimatsu has a place to hide her ramen," the girl, tilting her head, responded. "Kokkuri-san will never notice if he doesn't go to the storeroom."

[Kokkuri-san has avoided the storeroom ever since his gender-transformation incident.]

"Ah... well, let's get these back home first then decide what happens next." the older male responded, chuckling, this was going to be quite an amusing show for the next few weeks, possibly months.

* * *

"We're back," Shigaraki, taking off his geta, exclaimed, carrying the bags of items that the silver haired male had requested- no, demanded- him to go buy. He was assigned the duty of distracting Kokkuri-san while the other two hid the stash of ramen into the storehouse.

"Oh, welcome back," the silver haired male, hair tied up, carrying a trash bag, replied, looking up. "Where's the other two?" he asked, getting a suspicious aura from the tanuki.

"Oh, they went and uh- on a walk." the tanuki responded, walking towards the kitchen to drop off the items. "Say, Kitsune, when was the last time you sat down and let us do the cleaning instead?"

Kokkuri-san, of course, was highly suspicious of this. Following behind Shigaraki, he grumbled and sighed, responding quite unimpressedly.

"You've never helped out anyway, you lazy, good for nothing-"

"Kitsune."

The taller male stopped, one hand holding the bags of groceries, and turned to look at the other male. Something is not feeling right, the silver-haired male thought, as he stopped too to look at the other. "What?"

Shigaraki walked closer and put a hand- a larger, more well built and stronger one- on Kokkuri-san's shoulder, leaning in dangerously- so dangerously close, he could feel Shigaraki's breath against his face.

"-WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SHIGARAKI?"

"If ya were a woman right now, I'd kiss ya ter make ya shut up for a moment." The male chuckled and blew some air into the silver-haired's male's red face, his silver bangs swaying from the sudden gust of air. "Though I don't mind if it was you."

"W-WHAT?"

"I did say I live to give attention to girls- but you're actually quite attractive as a guy too, Kitsune."

"W-What are you saying, Shigaraki? This is a joke, right?!"

The taller male pulled back, giving him a serious, long stare.

"You're just like a perfect wife already, Kitsune. Shame you're wasting all of that on being a guy-"

**BANG.**

Shigaraki was hit with the frying pan.

"CUT IT OUT, YOU IDIOT!" the fox shouted, pulling up his sleeves- obviously flustered by what the tanuki said.

"Ow, that hurt." Shigaraki, rubbing his head, could only stare at the fox, slightly disoriented but still determined- at least his distraction was working.

Though, from outside the window, Kohina and Inugami both let out a loud "tch."

[It appears that they have been watching the lovey-dovey scene from the start.]

* * *

_**A/N**__:_ _I did say it was short. __Shall try and make more Shigakuri cause the world needs more Shigakuri. Shoutout to __SoylentRamen__for writing Shigakuri. You made my lack-of-shigakuri-week very happy. Might make a follow-up chapter if I feel like it -w-_


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N**: KameKame again, 1,4k words! That's 100 words more than chapter 1! That's enough achievement for me this month! Thanks guys for posting reviews on the previous chapter, hope this one isn't too horrible.

**Summary**: Shigaraki reevaluates his entire life's existence, thanks to Kokkuri-san.

* * *

For the past few days, Kokkuri-san had been furiously intent on wiping out EVERY cup noodle he sees on sight.

"Where the hell did all of these come from?!" he said to himself, tossing yet another one into the large plastic bag he carried about the house. He had not known that it was Inugami who had been planting them here and there at every inconspicuous nook and cranny of the house. It was as if he was fighting an invisible entity, but he somehow knew that it had something to do with Inugami trying to get rid of him by stressing him out to death so he would not be an obstacle between Inugami and Kohina.

He was not going to let THAT happen.

As he waged war on the invisible ramen ghost, Inugami only got more and more annoyed with each successful attempt of getting rid of ramen, as he was trying to stress the silver haired kitsune out enough to get a stomachache and go out of commission for a few days.

"Guess I'll have to use that way, huh," he grinned mischievously to himself, sure that this plan will definitely work.

* * *

Tired from searching and hunting for ramen all day, Kokkuri-san finally found the chance to sit down and get a drink, as he walked into the kitchen and headed to the fridge, grumbling to himself, he did not notice Inugami sneak past with a bucket full of water.

He opened the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water, and drank it straight from the bottle.

"Geez, who the heck is putting all these ramen all over the place? It's bad enough Kohina's got her own secret stash, now there's a secret ramen warrior putting ramen all over the house in all sorts of ridiculous places.." he grumbled as he sat down, taking another drink of his water.

Shigaraki, who was gone all day, entered, scratching his head.

"Eh, Kitsune, still up at this hour?" the tanuki asked, sitting down.

"Ah, yeah," the silver haired male would sigh, his ears lowering. "Someone's been putting ramen back into all sorts of places as soon as I turn around, and I suspect it's Inugami."

"Ah, is that so? G'luck," the tanuki replied, a light smirk crossing his face, as he knew what happened entirely, but...

_He looks so cute while he's frustrated._

Kokkuri-san glanced over at Shigaraki, his face slowly turning into one of the faces he makes when he's disgusted.

"Shigaraki, what are you grinning and blushing about? Did you do something perverted again? You damn disgusting old man." he got up and walked past the tanuki. "I'm too tired to nag you today, I'm going to take a bath and sleep."

Shigaraki could only watch.

* * *

Seated comfortably in the warm bath water, Kokkuri-san mused to himself that it must be Inugami trying to put him out of commission for a few days so that he could get to Kohina. Funny, considering Kohina had been such a good child and not eating ramen lately.

Did something happen?

Something definitely must have happened.

As the kitsune spirit left the bathroom, wrapped in a towel and using another to dry his long silver hair, he grumbled, planning to dig Inugami a new grave for this behavior.

"Sheesh, doesn't he know when to quit?" he grumbles, and got dressed.

The sudden sound that erupted from the kitchen surprised him.

It was Kohina's ramen alarm.

"KOHINA!" he said, slipping on his blue kimono, and rushing towards the kitchen. "DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO QUIT EATING THAT JUNK?"

As he entered the kitchen, unfortunately, Kohina wasn't there. What was waiting for him was a super-sized bowl of ramen, simmering in hot water, and the alarm ringing obnoxiously.

"Geez..."

He turned it off and looked at the ramen. It was suspicious. In fact, everything about this was suspicious. "Inugami, what have you been doing?" he grumbled and picked up the ramen.

SPLASH.

The entire bucket of iced water fell on him, the bucket landing right on his head.

He didn't notice that the ramen was tied to a fishing string that eventually led to the bucket tipping over on him.

Inugami came out of hiding and got the best and probably last laugh he will ever have.

"HAHAHA! I got you! Now you'll get a cold and you won't be able to get in the way between me and my darling's love!"

Kokkuri-san slowly lifted the bucket.

Slowly, slowly.

"Inugami..."

"Eh?" the dog spirit responded, backing away.

[Loud shouting was heard from the kitchen while Kohina ate her ramen in the living room in silence.]

"Today's cup-ramen is mixed in with the taste of sourness." she mused, slurping her ramen happily.

Probably it was.

* * *

Kokkuri-san left the kitchen, Inugami was beaten to a pulp, stabbed through the belly and lying in the bucket.

"Geez, if you have time to be pulling pranks, do something better." he grumbled.

And he was all wet.

He sighed. He'll have to change his clothes before he got a cold.

He got a pair of new dry clothes, shrugged off his blue kimono and undressed, tossing the wet clothes into the laundry basket, and got dressed again.

Shigaraki came by to see what the commotion was about.

"Eh, Kitsune. Did ya get drenched?" he asked.

"Yeah, Inugami did it."

"I thought it was suspicious since I saw 'im carrying ter bucket earlier."

"...Shigaraki, you could have told me, you useless old man."

Shigaraki laughed.

Kokkuri-san sneezed.

"Oh dear, yer caught a cold." Shigaraki commented, smirking.

Inugami deserves an award for this ingenious idea, the tanuki thought.

"No I'm not. I'm going to bed."

Achoo.

Achoo.

[Kokkuri-san wasn't kidding anyone but himself.]

That night, after an entire day of bad things, just when he thought he could get some sleep, he caught a cold. A bad one.

That put him out of commission for a few days until he got well, at least.

He grumbled and turned on his side, pulling the blanket higher to cover himself more.

Something warm was tossed across his body. He opened his eyes, drowsily.

It was Shigaraki, in his spirit form, his tail swishing from side to side, fixing the edges of the extra blanket that he had placed over the silver haired male.

"Yer should take time ter sit down and rest, Kitsune." the tanuki said, grinning.

"I am now, so shut up." Kokkuri-san could only respond shortly before he sneezed again.

"You go and sleep, it's going to be- ACHOO!- bothersome if you got sick too."

The tanuki sat down next to the fox, laying down like a fat ball of fluff.

"Sleep, I'll watch for Inugami in case he decide's ta rage revenge on ya."

"I don't need you to treat me like some sort of weakling, Shigaraki." the male protested indignantly. "I can take care of myself."

A puff of smoke and Shigaraki was lying on his side, hand on the silver-haired male's head.

"Sleep."

He gently caressed the long silver hair, stroking his ears, grinning.

"S-STOP TREATING ME LIKE A WOMAN!"

"I'm not. You're just a sick kid who should be mothered."

"I don't need you to mother me," the kitsune snapped, turning around, but it was clear he was flustered.

The gentle caresses did not cease, however, and he somehow found it comforting and warm. He fell asleep not long after.

Shigaraki stared. It was clear that this long haired fox was a tsundere.

A big, big tsundere.

And he thought that was cute.

He was supposed to be interested in girls. This felt wrong.

He got up and exited the room, leaving the other to sleep in peace.

Closing the door, he turned and saw Kohina and Inugami.

"Go to bed, Ojou-chan."

Kohina and Inugami, newly resurrected, had been hiding in the side listening.

"Kokkuri-san is sick?" she asked, a very angry Inugami clinging on to her head, plotting his revenge.

"Mn, yeah he is."

Shigaraki was sick, too.

"But can idiots get sick by getting splashed with cold water?" she questioned, tilting her head, Inugami clinging onto it to not fall off.

"Maybe. Who knows."

He felt like one himself, actually.

[Shigaraki is desperately in denial.]

"Ojii-chan, can spirits get sick?"

"That's something I'm not sure I can answer, Ojou-chan." the tanuki would pat her head gently and walk off, probably off to try and catch some of his own sleep.

Kohina and Inugami were left debating about what Shigaraki meant.

[Both of them did not get much sleep that night.]


End file.
